新聞出處(必填):https://goo.gl/pTnbq8

作者:Eric Prisbell, USA TODAY Sports

這篇文章已經出來四年多了，但讀到的時候仍感到震撼

看到球員在場上拚搏固然令球迷熱血沸騰，但許多球員背後的故事同樣值得玩味。


Smart went from 'dead or in jail' to Oklahoma State's selfless general

阿明如何從幫派人生到奧克拉荷馬州立大學的籃球悍將

FLOWER MOUND, Texas -- Six years before Oklahoma State point guard Marcus
Smart became one of the nation's most respected college basketball players,
he threw rocks at people's heads.

再成為奧克拉荷馬州立大學的明星控球後衛的六年前，
阿明可是個會往人家頭上丟石頭的混混。

How he blossomed into one of the sport's most humble stars, an unassuming
18-year-old potential NBA lottery pick, was through a journey defined by deep
personal loss and self-discovery.

而在到達今日的成功之前，阿明曾經迷失過，但也從中更了解自己。

Rage burned inside him after seeing cancer overtake one older brother and
cocaine nearly destroy another. Anger boiled while confronting a neighborhood
south of Dallas he called a war zone amid duplexes. He desperately sought to
inflict others with the pain that incessantly gnawed at his 12-year-old heart.

再看到一個哥哥因為癌症而走，另一個哥哥也差點被毒品毀了一生後，
阿明被心中的怒火所佔據，他甚至企圖想讓其他人一起因他所受的苦痛折磨，
那時的他只有十二歲。

One night near his home in Lancaster began like so many others, with Marcus
and a friend stuffing their pants pockets with rocks and positioning
themselves on the second floor of the apartment complex they called The
Pinks, looking for a target with a pulse. Little did Marcus know this would
be such a pivotal night in his life.

一天晚上，阿明與他的朋友口袋裡裝滿著石頭，待在公寓的二樓裡尋找著目標，
年輕的阿明沒想到那一晚會完全改變他的人生。

Spotting a man on a bike in a black hooded sweatshirt, they unleashed rocks
and celebrated with high-fives and laughs after – Bam! – the pelting
knocked the man to the ground. But when Marcus looked again, all he saw was
the bike. And all he heard was the thumping of a man racing up the stairwell
and a frenzied voice promising to kill him.

在鎖定了一位穿著黑色帽T的腳踏車騎士後，
兩個小傢伙丟出了石頭並成功命中目標
"碰!"
在短暫的相互擊掌慶祝後，阿明發現腳踏車騎士不見了。
接著聽到有人氣沖沖地衝上樓梯，並發毒誓要親手殺了他。

Marcus and his friend leaped over the second-story railing, landing hard on
the concrete below. The man quickly followed. Fueled by adrenaline and fear,
Marcus sprinted faster than he ever had on the football field or basketball
court, zigzagging through alleyways to an adjacent complex, The Meadows.

阿明和他的朋友兩人從二樓跳下，那人也迅速跟上，
在恐懼與腎上腺素的加持下，阿明衝刺得比他過去在足球場或籃球場跑得都快，
以Z字型的跑法衝到鄰近的綜合設施，一個他稱之為"草地"的地方。

Behind Marcus, the footsteps and menacing voice grew louder. Marcus did not
know that the man was a member of the Bloods street gang. And until he
glanced back in the dimly lit roads, he did not know what object the man held
in his hand: a loaded gun.

阿明身後的腳步聲與咒罵聲越來越大，他並不知道那人是血幫*的成員
(血幫:美國最大的黑人幫派之一)
直到他看清楚對方的樣子前，他也不知道對方手上拿了一把子彈上膛的槍。

Marcus knew he no longer was the generous kid who as a 4-year-old gave a
homeless man his coveted $20 bill, no longer the innocent child who pedaled
his bike in cowboy boots to McDonald's for free burgers. He knew he had
devolved into something else, a lost soul perhaps with just seconds left to
breathe. His heart pounding and soaked in sweat, he breathed so
uncontrollably he felt like his lungs were locked in a vise.

阿明知道，在那個當下他再也不是那個給遊民二十塊美金的大方四歲兒童
他也不再是那個川著牛仔靴，騎著腳踏車去吃免費麥當當的小孩子。
他知道他捲入了某些他無法控制的東西，或許下一秒就性命不保。
他的心跳急劇加速，冷汗直流，肺像是被鎖住般無法控制呼吸。

The man closed to within 15 yards. Marcus heard the ear-splitting sound of
four gunshots.

那人已在他15碼內的距離，接著他聽到4聲震耳欲聾的槍響。

"Ever see 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre'?" Marcus says now. "Just imagine him that
close to you with a chainsaw, that's how close he felt. All I kept thinking
was, Am I going to die? Is this how I die? What is he going to do if he
catches me but doesn't shoot me?"

"你們曾看過德州電鋸殺人狂嗎?想像著他拿著電鋸靠近你，當下的那種感覺。
我當下一直想著'我是不是要掛了?這就是我人生的最後了嗎?如果他沒射我他要對我幹嘛?'"

*************************************************************************

When fans see Marcus play college basketball now, racing up and down the
court with an intensity few can rival, there is little evidence of that
anger. Some players in the sport are more talented than Marcus, but few
possess such a unique skill set, and even fewer are as reluctant to boast
about it. To Marcus, his statistics are an afterthought; his teammates'
statistics matter more. He deflects attention in an age when most crave it.

當粉絲們看到阿明打大學籃球，在場上跑上跑下，那種強度只有少數球員能跟上。
這也間接反映了他心中的怒火。
有些球員或許比阿明更有天分，但阿明的天分是獨特的，
是個幾乎沒有人會願意特別去雕琢的技術。
對阿明來說，自己的數據那些之後再談，隊友的數據甚至更重要。
他摒棄了那些與他同年齡層的球員所追求的事物。

"It's his character," says Marcus' best friend and roommate Phil Forte, a
friend of Marcus since they were in third grade. "He plays with a chip on his
shoulder, not like a prima donna."

阿明最好的朋友與室友說:
"阿明的打起球來感覺充滿了怒火、甚至有點憤世嫉俗，而並非那種想蒐集鎂光燈焦點的人"

Fran Fraschilla, the ESPN analyst and Dallas resident who has watched Marcus
play since the ninth grade, says, "It is very rare you see a young player
with the countenance and knowledge of a 10-year NBA player … If you're going
into an alley fight, and you have the Incredible Hulk on your side, you feel
pretty good. That's what you have with him."

Espn的分析家與達拉斯居民Fran Franschilla也說
"很少看到有如此年輕的球員卻有著NBA老鳥的打球觀念...
如果你想要跟人家火拼，如果你的隊友是個無敵浩克，那感覺應該挺不賴的。
這就是阿明能給的。"

Syracuse coach Jim Boeheim says that by season's end there may not be a more
valuable player in the country. And Oklahoma State coach Travis Ford can
recount myriad stories that he finds so unusual, so refreshing in this
look-at-me-generation in which many players seek to compile highlight reels.

雪城大學總教練說在球季結束前大學籃壇不會有比阿明更有價值的球員。
阿明的球隊教練Travis Ford也說他跟阿明有許許多多非凡的故事，
尤其是在今日這種球員只注重個人成就與名聲的年代，這些故事更顯得可貴。"

"For a McDonald's All-American, his approach to the game is like no one I
have ever been around," Ford says. "If you are around him for five minutes,
you'd never guess that he is one of the best players in America."

"身為一個參與過麥當勞全明星賽的球員，阿明打球的方式是我前所未見的。
你如果在他身邊只待上個五分鐘，你根本猜不到他是全美最佳籃球員之一。"

Few know how Marcus became the way he is today. Says Marcus, "People always
ask me, 'How are you so humble?' When you go through things like I have,
there's only one way for you to be. Life is not a game. This is a cold world
out there – the world is very cold – and if you don't learn things and
understand things, this world can eat you up."

只有少數人知道阿明是怎麼變成今天這樣的。阿明自己就說了:
"人們總是問我'你怎麼這麼謙虛?'其實只要你經歷過我所經歷的，
就會知道我只有一種生存之道。
人生不是個遊戲，世界是很無情的。如果你沒有學習能力，世界會把你吞沒。"


Few know how his childhood fueled his competitiveness and shaped his
self-effacing persona. Marcus says he shared his story with USA TODAY Sports,
including many details that he never told close family members, so that other
troubled children who have endured the loss of loved ones and hardscrabble
environments have a template for success.

阿明告訴本報，他今天會透漏許多連他最親近的家人都不知道的細節。
他希望透過這個方式，能讓其他有過失去摯愛的孩子們知道如何度過難關，
並為他們設立成功的典範。

"I think about it every day, it's incredible," Marcus says. "Thank God I had
both parents and older brothers. My mom and brothers are my heroes … If I
didn't change what I was doing, I would be dead or in jail."

"我每天都會想到我是何等幸運。感謝老天給了我這樣的成長環境。
我的媽媽與我的哥哥們都是我的英雄...如果我沒有改變我之前的所作所為，
我大概會死在街上或是在監獄裡蹲了。"

Marcus was bred in a close-knit family that rarely sulked despite tragedy.
There was his mom, Camellia Smart, 58, who goes to dialysis three times a
week and who has lived with one kidney since, she says, "a kidney stone ate
up the other one" two decades ago. There's her husband of 38 years, Billy
Frank Smart, the 66-year-old biological father of Marcus and Michael Smart.
And there's Todd and Jeff Westbrook, who were born to a different father
decades before Michael and Marcus were born.

阿明在一個堅強的家庭成長。他的媽媽已經58歲了，每周要洗腎三次,只剩下一個腎臟。
她的另一顆腎臟因為腎結石二十年前就摘除了。
阿明有三個哥哥，其中一個是他的生父所生:Micheal Smart，
另外兩個Todd Westbrook與Jeff Westbrook則是同母異父的哥哥。

Camellia, whom the brothers deemed Wonder Woman for her fortitude and work
ethic, was the family's heart. Todd, a second father figure to Michael and
Marcus, was its backbone.

阿明媽媽堅忍不拔的個性在這兄弟檔裡就猶如神力女超人般告訴他們工作應有的態度，
並支持著整個家庭。阿明同母異父的哥哥Todd則向是Micheal與Marcus第二個父親。

Marcus knew that if anyone was destined to play in the NBA, it was Todd, who
shot 62 percent from the field one season as a guard for Lancaster High. By
the time Marcus would dribble a basketball all over the home in his boots, he
had already heard all the stories from the 1980s that made him idolize Todd.

阿明知道如果有人命中注定可以打NBA的話，會是他的哥哥Todd。
在他的大學生涯時期，他以一個後衛身分拿下62%的投籃命中率。
那時阿明穿著靴子在家裡到處運球呢。
在阿明早以聽說過Todd的在80年代的豐功偉業，這讓Todd變成阿明的偶像。

Marcus knew that when doctors found a tumor behind Todd's eye at 15 years
old, his mom felt like "someone took a knife and split my chest in two." But
he knew Todd barely flinched, telling the doctor, "Okay, what do we do next?"

Todd在15歲的時候被醫生發現有顆腫瘤在他的眼後，
那時他媽媽心痛到彷彿有人拿著刀把她剖成兩半。
但是Todd卻沒有半點畏懼，只問醫生
"好吧，那下一步是什麼?"

Though the cancer spread to his lungs, then his stomach, Todd always found
enough resolve to mentor his brothers. He showed them how to shave, shake a
man's hand and sell themselves in job interviews. He explained to Michael how
to wear a condom. Even as he turned gaunt and too weak to walk to the
bathroom without resting, he often called Michael and Marcus into his bedroom
to watch the Discovery or History channels.

就算癌症擴散到他的肺與胃，Todd總是有辦法照顧他的兄弟。
他教導他們如何刮鬍子，跟人家握手並在面試的時候推銷自己。
他甚至教Micheal如何戴保險套0.0
就算當他虛弱到無法一鼓作氣走到廁所，他仍會要求阿明與Micheal到他的房間看探索頻道

"That is what I always admire about him," Marcus says, "that tenacity and
that ambition to keep living even though you know you don't have much time."

"這也是為什麼我一直崇拜著他，那種對生命的韌性與雄心，
就算你意識到自己的時間已所剩無幾。"

As a 9-year-old, nothing meant more to Marcus than family. When Camellia saw
he was wearing sneakers with holes in the bottom to school, Marcus shrugged.
When a relative offered to buy him Nikes, he pointed to other $19 sneakers
instead. And in December 2003, when Camellia asked him what he wanted for
Christmas, Marcus said one word: "Nothing."

在阿明九歲的時候，家庭就是他的全部。
當阿明媽媽看到他穿著破洞的球鞋去上課，阿明不以為意。
當鄰居想幫他買一雙Nike，他反而要一雙19美元的平價球鞋。
2003年的聖誕節，阿明媽媽問他想要什麼禮物，阿明只回"我什麼都不要。"

"Seriously, baby, what do you want?" Camellia repeated.

"寶貝，說真的，你到底想要什麼?"

"Momma, I don't want anything," Marcus answered. "I ask God to bless me and
my family to be together for Christmas."

"媽媽，我什麼都不想要。"阿明回"我只要我們全家人能一起過聖誕節就好。"

Together with his family for the holidays, Marcus received that gift. But on
Jan. 9, 2004, Marcus' aunt called him and his cousin inside from playing,
asked them to sit down and tearfully delivered the news everyone feared: Todd
was dying. The family was at the hospital. Marcus stared at her, gazing at
her face, thinking he was dreaming.

那年，阿明如願拿到他的聖誕禮物。
但兩個禮拜後，阿明的阿姨將玩耍的阿明與其他堂表兄弟姊妹叫進來，
聲淚俱下地告訴他們Todd已經在彌留了。
那時一家人都在醫院，阿明看著阿姨的臉，覺得自己是在作夢。

Then he sprung up and bolted out the door, slamming it so hard the glass
shattered. His cousin chased him down, wrestling him to the ground while
Marcus screamed. At the hospital, Marcus ran down a long hallway until he
spotted the rest of his family, all bawling.

接著他奪門而出，因為把門關得太大力連玻璃都碎了。
阿明的堂兄弟把他壓制在地上，只聽到阿明在地上發出的悲鳴。
阿明接著在醫院看到其他的家人，每個人都在哭泣。

Todd, at 33 years old and after an 18-year battle with cancer, had died.

Todd，在與病魔抗戰了十八年後仍就瀟灑地走了，享年33歲。

In Todd's hospital room, among crying relatives still trying to speak to
Todd, Marcus walked to the foot of the bed, slowly knelt and touched Todd's
foot. "It was cold as ice," he remembers. "I have never felt something so
cold and so hard in the human body before."

在病房哩，所有的家屬仍常識喚醒Todd，阿明跪到床腳旁，碰了一下Todd的腳。
"那幾乎跟冰塊一樣冷，我從來沒有在人體身上感受過這麼低的溫度。"阿明回憶道。

Camellia, tears rushing down her face, picked Marcus up and told him
everything would be okay. Still in disbelief, Marcus walked to the other side
of the bed thinking Todd was merely sleeping. Marcus shook him and yelled,
"Todd, wake up!"

眼淚從阿明媽媽的臉頰上不斷落下，但仍告訴阿明一切都會沒事的。
但阿明仍無法接受事實，他覺得Todd只是在睡覺罷了。
他甚至搖著Todd的屍體並試圖大聲叫醒他。

Marcus walked to the edge of the bed and placed a gentle kiss on Todd's lips.
Marcus then put his hands in the air, saying, "Todd is just like a butterfly.
He flew away."

阿明最終走到床邊並向他的哥哥吻別，他將手放在空中說著
"他只是變成了蝴蝶，飛走了..."

Losing Todd was a blow the family struggled to endure. In their home in
DeSoto, Marcus and Michael, sometimes at the same time, could not help but
crawl into Todd's bed at night, putting themselves to sleep to that familiar
sound of the Discovery Channel. It was the same room where they would always
put a hanger above the door in the shape of a basketball hoop and would join
Todd in shooting balled up socks until Todd grew fatigued.

失去Todd對於阿明全家是一件很艱難的事。
有時阿明跟他的親哥哥Michael會在夜晚同時爬到Todd的床上，聽著熟悉的探索頻道
步入夢鄉。過去在同一個房間他們會把一架放在門上當作籃框讓Todd享受投籃的滋味
直到他累了為止。

Now without Todd, the brothers found a catharsis in surrounding themselves
with Todd's memory, his images and sounds.

Todd離開了，但殘存的兄弟倆仍找到方法緬懷Todd的一切。

But Marcus also had other images seared into his mind: his 19-year-old
brother Michael, who had been a talented point guard at Lancaster High,
spiraling into a world of gangs, drugs and guns. Michael became affiliated
with the Bloods street gang and acted as if he had a death wish.

但是阿明還有別的事要擔心:他的19歲哥哥Michael。
在高中時期他是個天賦異稟的控球後衛，卻誤入了幫派、毒品與槍械的世界。
Michael最終加入了血幫，到處鬧事，好像不在乎死活一樣。

Michael saw friends accumulate up to $8,000 a week working the streets,
driving Mercedes Benzes and '86 Chevys. They were decked out in gold and
diamonds and had oversized flat-screen televisions before much of suburban
American owned one.

Michael看到朋友每個禮拜透過黑社會進帳8000美金(約25萬台幣)，
開著賓士與雪佛蘭皮卡，身上穿金戴銀，家裡都放著大尺寸的全平面電視，
那時這種電視在美國還沒普及呢!

Marcus watched Michael springboard in that life and nearly drown. Michael
says he made $2,500 per week, selling crack and other drugs and pimping out
women. To protect himself, he says he had at least five firearms: "A .40 and
.45 caliber, a TEC-9, an AK-47 and a 12-gauge shotgun."

阿明看著自己的哥哥拿自己的生命開玩笑，甚至差點玩火自焚。
Michael說他靠著販毒與拉皮條每周進帳2500鎂。
他甚至宣稱自己擁有五種槍械以供自保，從手槍、散彈槍到AK都有。

After they moved to Lancaster, Marcus at times would run to the corner of the
1500 block of Bluegrove Road and make futile attempts to get Michael to come
back home. Undeterred, Marcus would wait up until the wee hours of the
morning to make sure Michael – though at times frazzled from drugs –
returned home safe.

搬家後，阿明每天試著在街上勸哥哥回家，但總是徒勞無功。
但他仍不死心，他願意熬夜到凌晨只確定哥哥平安回家，
有時哥哥回家時毒品的藥效甚至還沒消退。

Marcus, just 10 years old, would sit close to Michael in the near darkness of
their home and tell him, "Momma does not need a call at 2 a.m. telling her
they found you in jail or six feet under. She already lost one son."

阿明會與哥哥坐在房子的陰暗角落對他說:
"媽不需要在凌晨兩點的時候才發現你被送進監獄或被殺害。她已經失去一個兒子了。"

那時阿明才十歲。

Marcus would raise his little hand and wipe away tears from Michael's face.

阿明也會舉起他的小手抹掉哥哥臉上的眼淚，並告訴他:

"Stay out of trouble," Marcus told him. "I promise, I got you, brother."

"離麻煩遠一點。哥我向你保證，我會保護你。"

Looking back eight years later, Marcus says, "We had plenty of nights like
that. I was growing up around it. I was seeing it. I was seeing his pain. I
didn't like what he was doing, but he was still my brother and I loved him.
You see that stuff on the news and play the [video] games, and it's like a
video game. When you see it in front of you, it's terrifying."

八年後，阿明回憶著過去，說"我們有無數的夜晚經歷那樣的事。
我就是這樣長大的，我看到我哥所經歷的痛苦。
我不喜歡我哥那時在做的勾當，但他仍是我的兄弟，而我也愛他。
有時當你在新聞上看到類似的消息，感覺好像沒什麼。
但當事實發生在你面前，那其實是很可怕的。"

Less than a year after Todd's death, Marcus was at an AAU tournament when
Camellia relayed him a message that Michael was in the hospital. During a
one-month binge of cocaine abuse, Michael snorted so much on one occasion
that he toppled over in the home and hurt his eye. Gary Westbrook, his uncle
who was rendered a paraplegic after being shot in the spine in a carjacking,
came off his wheelchair to pound his chest to try to revive him before
calling 911.

Todd死後不到一年，阿明正在AAU錦標賽上拚搏，卻收到他哥哥住院的消息。
在過度吸食古柯鹼後，Michael在家裡不甚昏迷跌倒並撞傷了眼睛。
阿明的叔叔過去因劫車事件遭歹徒射傷了脊椎而半身不遂，
為了趕在救護車到前救Michael一命，奮不顧身跌下輪椅對他做心肺復甦術。


And soon after, Marcus again was in a long hospital hallway, bracing himself
for another ice cold foot to grasp, thinking all the while that he could lose
a second brother in the span of a year. Upon entering the room, his emotions
swirled as he saw tubes coming out of Michael.

不久阿明趕到了醫院，緊緊抱著自己深怕他即將在一年內失去另一個哥哥。
當他在病房裡看到插著管的哥哥複雜的情緒突然湧現。

Marcus gripped his hand.

阿明緊緊地握住自己的拳頭。

"I do remember the look in Marcus' eyes," Michael says. "And it was scary."

"我還記得阿明的眼睛那時候的樣子。"Michael說。"那超可怕的。"

Says Marcus, "He should have been dead, that's how much was in his system."

阿明回憶道"Michael那時候根本快掛了。"

Michael remembers the doctor telling him, "I'm here to save lives. If you
want to do this to yourself, don't come here. Just kill yourself."

Michael記得醫生那時告訴他"我是來這裡救人的，
如果你還想這樣繼續下去，就別回來了，自己了結吧。"

***************************************************

Michael recovered and went to the altar in church that Sunday. Though he was
not done with street life, he says he never sniffed cocaine again. He vowed
to keep Marcus away from that lifestyle. And he told gang members to leave
Marcus alone or face Michael's wrath of bullets.

康復之後，Michael每個星期都去做禮拜。雖然他還未從街頭全身而退，但他不再碰毒了。
他發誓要讓阿明遠離他所經歷的，
他告訴其他幫派份子若他們敢動阿明的話就等著吃子彈吧。

"You go down a different path," Michael told Marcus. "It's called a straight
arrow. People want to call you a punk or different? You be different. I
promise you, six years later when you look back, see who is different and who
made a difference."

Michael告訴阿明"你要跟我走不一樣的路，你是一個正直的人。
別管人家說什麼，你是獨特的。
我向你保證，六年之後，你會知道是誰脫穎而出
六年之後，你會知道誰是笑到最後的那個人。"

But problems were beginning to fester for Marcus, whose rage simmered. As a
young child, he hardly made a misstep, except when he says he foolishly
smoked marijuana the only time in his life, when he was no older than 8. He
says it made him so sick that he had to embarrassingly tell his mom, who took
him to the emergency room. Camellia says Marcus only told her he was sick,
not that he smoked pot.

但是阿明的問題才剛剛開始，因為他心以怒火中燒。
幼年的阿明幾乎沒犯什麼過錯，除了八歲前有一次吸食了大麻。
他難過到不得不向媽媽求救，最終送到了急診室。

阿明媽媽記得阿明那時候只說他生病了，但她不知道前因後果XD

But after losing Todd and nearly losing Michael, while surrounded by
classmates flashing gang signs and guns on street corners, Marcus says, "I
just felt really lost. I definitely changed."

在失去了一個哥哥又差點失去了另一個，又環繞在充滿幫派與槍械的校園與街頭，
阿明承認"我那時很困惑，我變了。"

He and friends would steal candy, food and soda from stores. He uncorked much
of his anger on the football field, but his greatest emotional release came
from fighting. He called himself a bully, preying on the weak and strong.

他與他的朋友會去商店偷零嘴。他在橄欖球場上釋放他心中的不滿，
但最能讓他釋放壓力的其實是跟人打架。
他稱自己是個霸凌者，不論對方強弱先打了再說。

"It feels like if you have a broken arm and you just want to scream," Marcus
says of his anger. "The worst pain you can ever think of, that's exactly how
angry I felt. That's how bad the anger was and exactly how bad I wanted to
release it. Got to release it. It's like a boiling pot. I didn't know how to
express it beyond fighting."

"那種感覺就像是受傷了想要大聲喊痛的感覺。
我那時心中的憤怒就像是人身上所能感受到最劇烈的痛楚。
我非常想要釋放那股情緒，我一定要宣洩壓力，因為我覺得自己都快爆炸了。
我那時並不知道除了打架我能怎麼辦。"

He would get in three fights per week. He looked for any weapons he could
find. He would throw knives and branches at people. He recalls nearly
breaking a kid's neck. He says he felt like he could have killed someone.

他每個禮拜會幹三場架，他會找各式各樣的武器，朝人丟刀子與板手，
他甚至差點折斷小朋友的脖子，
他說他覺得他那時很可能會殺人。

On one occasion, he and a friend were jumped and outnumbered by guys. Marcus
pulled out a pocketknife. They pulled out a pellet gun. Marcus went home and
got his dad's .22 caliber pistol. Michael stopped him at the door before
Marcus had the chance to hunt down the kids.

有一次，他與他的朋友被一群小夥子包圍，
阿明手上有一把折疊刀，他們人手一把BB槍。
阿明回到家後拿走了爸爸的手槍，Michael好在在他犯了大錯前阻止了他。

The fights escalated. He slammed another kid's head into the concrete. At one
point, the principal called him into his office and told him he was to go to
alternative school for 30 days.

但那場打鬥仍未被因此阻止，阿明抓著一個小夥子的頭撞向水泥地。
有一次，校長甚至告訴阿明他要去感化學校待上三十天。

"It was like jail," Marcus says. "Good behavior and you can get out early."

"那就像是監獄一樣，你表現得好你就可以早點離開。"阿明說。

The night that remains most crystallized in Marcus' mind is when he was
running for his life from the man in the black hooded sweatshirt. He and his
friend raced to a trail in the woods they knew well.

讓阿明最難以忘記的仍是那天被穿黑色帽梯的幫派分子追殺，
他與他的朋友駔後逃入了他們熟悉的樹林裡。

They made quick turns and knew a low-hanging branch required them to duck.
The man did not duck, and they heard him get knocked to the ground. Once home
that night, Marcus never closed his eyes.

他們不停地變換方向，躲躲藏藏，最終誘使了黑衣人撞到樹幹而昏厥在地上。
那晚阿明回到家後，整晚未闔上雙眼。

"My life was almost taken," Marcus says. "I was terrified. I didn't know what
to do. From some stupid decision I decided to make, one stupid decision that
I felt was good, that I felt was fun, it could have easily taken my life.
That's a lesson learned.

"我差點就沒命了，我超怕的，我不知道該怎麼辦。
有些白癡的決策或許會讓我覺得很爽，有些白癡決策會讓我覺得很好玩，
但這是很容易玩火自焚的，那天我學到教訓了。"

"I really don't tell people that story because what would you say? What would
you do if you were in that situation? It's just not a pretty sight to try to
imagine running, literally running for your life."

"我並沒有告訴別人這件事，但我又能說什麼呢?在那種處境又能做什麼?
那並不是一個值得迴響的往事，根本就是在逃命了。"

Marcus never told Michael that the man – an acquaintance of Michael -- shot
at him, only that the man tried to beat him up. Marcus knew that if he had
told Michael all the details, Michael might have killed the man.

阿明只告訴他哥那個黑衣人只是想揍他一頓，因為Michael認識那個混混。
若他據實以報，Michael可能會殺了那個人。

"You see how he thinks?" Michael says. "If I just keep this to myself, my
brother won't get in trouble and I just won't do it anymore. I would have
gone out and somebody might have gotten killed. He came home safe. And I'm
still here."

Michael接著說
"知道阿明是怎麼想的了吧。如果我懂得收手阿明就不會惹到這些麻煩。
那天如果他告訴實情我是真的會出門殺了他。
阿明知道什麼叫適可而止，他已經步入了正軌，但我仍身處在危險當中。"

And he never told his mother, but at the time she knew he needed help, an
escape from that environment.

阿明也從未將這件事告訴他媽，但當時她知道阿明需要些幫助，
那環境不適合阿明成長。

"I knew I had to do something," she says. "You know how you know something is
wrong, you can feel it. I've always told my boys, there's nothing too hard to
come and talk to me about."

"我那時知道我該做點什麼，"阿明媽媽說，"事情不對勁的時候你總是會有種直覺，
你就是會知道。我總是告訴我的孩子，不要害怕告訴我任何東西。"

One day she sat Marcus down and talked. He told her about the fights. "He was
just tired almost of living. I said, 'Baby, why haven't you told me this
before?' " Camellia asked. " 'Momma, I didn't want to worry you.' "

有一天她坐在阿明旁邊找他聊天，他說了這些打鬥的事情。
"阿明那時已經對生活感到厭煩，我說'寶貝，你怎麼之前都沒告訴我?'
他回我說'媽...因為我不想讓你擔心。'"

"I didn't let the gangs rob my other boys, and I was not going to let them
rob Marcus," she says. "He was so depressed. You're battling out there. Peer
pressure is a mother. 'Should I do this, do that? If I don't do this, I'm a
coward.' He was too young to live through that."

"我不會讓那些幫派奪走我的孩子，我也不會讓他們奪走阿明。他那時真的很低落，
他那時也努力地想讓自己變得更好，但這些同儕壓力那時的阿明來講真的太超過了。"

Marcus took anger management classes, which he says helped a great deal. And
the family moved into a three-bedroom ranch house in Flower Mound, a suburb
west of Dallas. Camellia relied on advice from the family of Phil Forte,
Marcus' best friend who lived in Flower Mound, to select a school.

阿明後來也拿了些情緒管理的課，他說那真的幫了他大忙。
他們後來搬到了達拉斯郊區，阿明媽媽那時也聽取阿明室友家人的建議，
選擇一個適合他的大學。

Moving was a culture shock. Marcus would see people walking around outside at
night and instinctively flinch. Friends would have to tell him that it was
just a man walking his dog. Marcus now could sit on the family's back porch
without hearing gunshots or fighting. The effect on Marcus was unmistakable.

搬家總會帶來些文化衝擊，阿明在晚上看到路人總是會本能地提起防備。
阿明在也不會在家後院聽到械鬥的聲音或是槍響，而這些地卻為阿明帶來正面影響。

"He was like reborn," Camellia says. "How would you put it? Like he stepped
out of the darkness to the light. That is how remarkable the change was."

"阿明就像是重生了一般，"媽媽說道，"就像是從黑暗之中走出，
那個變化是淺而易見的。"

Marcus channeled his aggression in football and then in his primary sport,
basketball. Teachers told Camellia how impressed they were that Marcus lacked
a sense of entitlement that some other athletes possessed. When Marcus won
trophies or awards, he would quickly put them aside and turn to YouTube to
study intricate skills like Kobe Bryant's footwork. And when the recruiting
letters came, he didn't dwell on them, instead hitting the gym with Michael.

阿明先是將他的怒氣宣洩在橄欖球上，後來又轉到了籃球場。
教練對阿明媽媽說他於對阿明沒有一般球員的傲氣與虛榮心感到印象深刻。
當阿明贏下了比賽他會把獎盃放在一旁，繼續上youtube磨練自己的技術，
像是Kobe Bryant的夢幻步伐(好像沒有學好0.0)。
而當大學的升學的邀請函寄到家中，他也沒高興多久，就陪著哥哥去健身房訓練了。

Sitting in an Applebee's last week, Michael's eyes welled up as he reflected
on Marcus, a younger brother he says he looks up to as if he were an older
brother. Michael says Marcus regularly encourages him to keep his life above
board and tells him how proud he is that Michael, who is now 27 and works at
a warehouse, gave up selling drugs a few years ago.

上個禮拜Michael坐在餐廳內看著阿明，身為弟弟卻扮演著哥哥腳色對他說會保護他。
Michael說阿明總是鼓勵著他成為一個更好的人，並告訴他他為自己的哥哥感到驕傲。
Michael今年(2013年)已經27歲了，幾年前以金盆洗手，現在在倉儲工作。

"God had me on this Earth for a reason," Michael says. "And I think that
might be the reason – my brother. He is doing something my mom wanted for
all of us, to be successful. He is making us believe. You look at Marcus.
Everything is complete. He has it all.

"上帝讓我留在這個世上是有原因的，"Michael說，"那個原因就是阿明。
他正在完成我媽對我們的寄望，成為一個成功的人。他讓我們願意相信。
當你看到阿明，他已經把所有的東西都處理得好好的了，他現在已經擁有一切。"

"When (Mom) looks at Marcus, it just brightens up her day. Todd is gone, but
he's living in Marcus. It's crazy, man. You have met Todd because you met
Marcus. Marcus seems like a big brother."

"當我媽看著阿明，她的一天就跟著美好起來。Todd雖然走了，但她活在阿明體內。
這超瘋狂的，其實你們已經見過Todd了，因為你們見過阿明，他就像他的大哥一樣。"

Back in Camellia's suburban home, which is filled with Marcus' trophies,
signed basketballs and Adidas shoes from the McDonald's All-American game,
she walked to the fireplace and picked up a team picture of Todd from
Lancaster's 1987-1988 season. Todd returned that senior season despite
playing with little more than one eye and helped Lancaster to a No. 2 ranking
in the Texas Association of Basketball Coaches' Class 4A poll.

回到阿明媽媽得住處，那裏掛滿著阿明的獎盃，
簽名球與阿明在麥當勞明星賽穿的愛迪達球鞋。
她接著走到了壁爐拿起了Todd在1988年帶領著高中球隊拿下德州高校亞軍。
那時Todd重返高中校隊，其中一支眼睛也快看不到了。

In the picture, Todd wore No. 3, the same number each brother wore in high
school. Each brother has a tattoo in memory of Todd. Marcus was also
interested in wearing the No. 3 at Oklahoma State, but was told it was
unavailable because Dan Lawson, who died in the Oklahoma State plane crash of
2001, had worn it. Marcus instead chose 33 because that was Todd's age when
he died.

在照片中，Todd穿著三號球衣。每個兄弟身上都有Todd的紀念刺青。
阿明本來想在大學球隊穿著三號球衣紀念哥哥，但因為奧大的三號球衣已經退休，
為紀念空難遇難的球員Dan Lawson。阿明另選了33號作為背號。
33歲，正是Todd離開的年紀。

In Saturday's game against Texas Tech, Marcus scored only three points but
didn't care. The team won. Marcus reflects on his life every day,
appreciative of how far he has come and determined to always play hard and
unselfishly. He is intent not to let his brother's name go in vain.

禮拜六對上德州理工的比賽，阿明雖然全場僅得三分，但球隊獲得了勝利。
阿明每天都對他的人生感到珍惜，他知道他是何等幸運才有今天的成果。
他總是全身投入於球場，並打得無私。
他努力打球為的就是榮耀他的哥哥。

He says he has firm control now over his emotions, and his coach, Travis
Ford, calls him one of the most genuine players he has been around.

他說他已經很能控制自己的情緒了，他的教練則說他是他見過最純真的球員。

"I don't want to be that person they look at and say, 'He's an A-hole, he's
mean,'" Marcus says. "I want them to look at Marcus Smart and say he's the
nicest guy I have ever met. I want to hear good things. I don't want to hear
any negative things about me. It makes me look bad. It makes me feel bad. It
makes my family look bad. I'm a reflection of my mom, my brothers and
everyone in my family. How I carry myself is a reflection of how they raised
me. I've learned that."

"我不希望人們見到我時會說'這傢伙是個混帳，他很糟糕。'"阿明說，
"我希望他們看到我會會說我是他們見過最棒的人。我喜歡聽好話。
我不喜歡別人跟我把負面的事物連結一起，那讓我看起來很糟，感受很糟，
讓我的家庭顏面無光。我反映著我的媽媽，我的兄弟與我的家人。
我是個什麼樣的人同時反映出我的家人是怎麼養育的我的，這是我長久以來所學到的。"

***************************************

阿明加油。

文章比我想像的長好多啊QQQ

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※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc), 來自: 24.205.9.144
※ 文章網址: https://www.ptt.cc/bbs/Celtics/M.1491106377.A.FA9.html
※ 編輯: jasonlin1993 (24.205.9.144), 04/02/2017 12:19:45
※ 編輯: jasonlin1993 (24.205.9.144), 04/02/2017 14:40:36