I can’t be away from the kids. Not the mom yang happy to have even one night without them. My “me time” is just being alone for a few hours hiding so i can watch trevor noah jabbing at US politicians and james cordon’s carpool karaoke. It’s hard to admit sebab i tak suka orang clingy tapi i’m the clingy one now 😭 Returning to work and being on set is always the hardest thing i have to do, walaupun i suka the script, story and everything but a few days before work I will cry (inside), rasa berat & guilty cukup dalam hati. Every day is like “bila nak habis.. nak ajar aurora draw fish and nak tolong momad siapkan homework or nak tukar arrangement bilik diorg (lagi)”. Normally after every project, I’ll have to break for at least a month, baru boleh pujuk hati untuk kerja balik. Bila I depress rindu anak, teruk. I boleh bad mood sesangat and tak ada will to work. Kalau before Covid Aurora dah serupa PA I dah. I angkut je sebab sama-sama rindu. Momad on off sebab dah besar tapi dia akan selalu video call tanya bila nak baliiik. HAIH! Next year I wanna slow down. I sacrificed a lot this year. I had to overcome something so painful. A lot of time, effort and money wasted. So cukup, I dah selesai satu issue in 2020. Next year insyaAllah, I wanna be the “always home, baking and decorating” mom. Doesn’t mean I won’t be busy just a better kind of busy. I wanna just release songs, get into dancing again, create more content that’ll make you guys also feel more connected with me.... ultimately do things that’ll give me more time with my kids. 2021 you better not be another 2020. Gimme that 2001 “itz britney bish” and paris hilton’s “that’s hot” vibes or i donchwanit.

Happy Mothers Day to all Mothers, soon-to-be Mothers, future mothers & especially to you who have been praying day & night to be a mother. My prayers is always with you 🤍 Semoga kita sama2 jadi ibunda yg tercinta utk anak2 kita, contoh terbaik zuriat kita, figura sempurna buat semua anak2 yg dekat dgn kita. Sebaknya sambutan hari ibu tahun ini terlalu indah dgn kehadiran @muhammadnoahzayn terima kasih @zaidbowie kerana jadikan Ika seorang Mommy! pssst dia kata semalam thanks sebab jadi Mommy paling power dalam dunia.! 🙈 Tahu tak dah 7 tahun I jadi Mommy. My first love is Kakak Numa anak adik I. Cucu sulung dalam family. Numa ajar I kasih sayang rindu terhadap anak kecil.. sayang nya kt kakak Numa sampai nangis2 rindu cium baju.Diikuti Sofea my niece, cinta hati manja yg sentiasa kejut I pagi2 bila I kahwin pindah, terus demam rindu...seterusnya Eleanor the prettiest baby Ive ever seen.. then I kenal Momad, Luq, Adam & Hayyan these cute soleh boys before I lahirkan my boy Muhammad Noah Zayn .. Aihhh sebaknya sekarang I ada Noah Zayn dah boleh guna emoticons ni 🤱🏻👨‍👩‍👦👩‍👦heheheheheh @mothercaremalaysia #mothercaremalaysia #myparentpanel #myparenttalk

Selamat hari raya semuaaa... Mateen ngan abg momad & kak ya malam raya...