【我親愛的Zoom視訊客人們】
To My Dear Zoom Clients

我忍了真的⋯⋯真的⋯⋯很久，今天過後實在忍無可忍，一定要叮嚀所有過去和未來的客人們。

我年紀很大了，受不了太大的刺激。

拜託，你們可以Zoom好來嗎？😓😑

一、Zoom視訊的視角 = 拍護照照的視角

護照自2020年起就已成為古董，但大家這一生應該有拍過證件照吧！

對了，就是要頭髮整齊，讓我看到你的雙耳、雙眼、鼻子、嘴巴、頸項和肩膀，到胸部。

我批八字時，需要看整個面相。不要讓你一半的臉掉出鏡頭外，這樣很像鍾無艷，也不要嘴巴不見掉，這樣我很像在跟一條羅漢魚視訊。

我看面相包括看你的嘴巴、牙齒和說話時的嘴形。是的，看相就是需要那麼仔細。

如果你的螢幕太低，那就找書本或舊報紙，把螢幕墊高一點。別讓我整一個小時半只看到你的雙下巴，會把你的面相比例給看錯。

不要一直告訴我不好意思，方法是人想出來的。

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二、光線

太暗，我看你如見鬼。
太亮，我會看不清你的膚色。
拉開窗簾，不要背向陽光。
有必要的話，就直接開燈！

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三、勿放什麼椰樹沙灘/金門大橋的虛擬背景圖

什麼虛擬背景圖都不要放啦～

我的家美最重要，我不在乎你的家美不美，我只是來看命的。

如果你的Wi-Fi不是很強，電腦功能不是很厲害，這類的虛擬背景圖會讓你的視訊畫面卡卡的。

有時你轉個身，整個右邊不見了，或部份的頭髮少了，讓我覺得我好像在看恐怖片，嚇人啊～

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四、環境和聲音

有些海外客人其實非常用心。為了與我視訊，特別去買有麥克風的耳機🎧，讓我能更清楚的聽到他們的聲音。😍

沒有使用耳機和麥克風的客人，往往他們的聲音會有種空氣般的回音，如果他們本身講話又小聲，我的耳機聲量開滿，我還是聽得滿辛苦的

也有香港和馬來西亞客人租過會議室、鐘點房間或單人工作室，就是為了不受家人的干擾，能安心的與我視訊。😍

最有趣的是，去年新加坡阻斷措施時，有位男客人跑到屋外的走廊坐在地上與我視訊。只是外頭風聲有點大，我好幾次都聽不清楚他的聲音。

曾有客人在咖啡廳與我視訊。咖啡廳裡的高談闊論聲和器皿的敲擊聲，頻頻從我的耳機闖進我的耳朵，哇～我的耳朵那時真的是活受罪，還要裝一副氣定神閒的樣子。

天啊，兩次過後，我寧願退錢，也不再見這樣的客人了。耳朵只有一對，我要保護好啊！

在這裡聲明：一般我們買手機時的那種有麥克風的耳機，就已能視訊。沒有戴耳機和麥克風的客人，我一概會拒絕諮詢，把費用原銀奉還。

五、孩子

曾試過諮詢的前20分鐘，一直被女客人的小孩打擾，進來哭著要媽媽主持公道。

如果你家中有六歲以下的兒童，會時不時來敲你的門，我建議你還是先別約我。你這樣會分心，無法聽好我交代的事，而我也得一直等你去安撫你的孩子，就無法在限定時間內看完你的八字，這樣對誰都不公平。

六、我只見客人一人

這個規矩，從我一出道就定下來，也清楚的寫在網站上，根本不用一而再的來試探水溫。

但這兩個星期，還是有客人硬闖關，事先安排自己的配偶/孩子坐在電腦的另一面，要他們聽我講他的八字。

我從不改我的規矩，也沒有八字或風水是我非看不可的。

讀書這麼高，連自己的命都不能自己負責，這已經不是能改到命的人了。

你一定要你的配偶陪你聽，那你需要的不是我來教你改命，是你的配偶來安你的心。

將來若還有這樣的事，我會直接中斷視訊，把錢退回去。

七、「我第一次用Zoom！」

可是從報名那天到今天的諮詢，你有兩個月的時間去摸索。

兩個月，怎麼還是錯誤百出？因為客人根本沒有事先準備和練習。

結果我就這樣等了20分鐘，還得等對方下載軟件。

Zoom不難使用，但如果是你沒有花時間去摸索，就不要撒謊，直接說，我就直接退現錢。

品德是改命的資糧，不要為了自己能脫身就隨便編一個漏洞百出的謊，還說自己是好人。這...不會臉皮太厚了嗎？

小事都不願做好，絕對不會成大器。

八、暈車

有些客人用Ipad或手機來視訊。

重點是，他一支手拿著手機，一支手拿筆寫筆記。他一邊寫，另一支手就一邊搖晃。他做在床上，移動一下，手機就彷彿大海嘯幾下🌊

我一天如果見三個這樣客人，我的視線就搖晃了5個小時。工作完畢後，頭也會痛得厲害，無法完成晚上製片的工作。

沒有自拍器三腳架，也應該有些書本或東西來頂著手機。

各位，多點善心，為我著想一下吧⋯⋯

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To My Dear Zoom Clients

I have been enduring it for a really really long time. That's it! I am gonna put a stop to this after today and send out this reminder to all my past and future clients.

I am getting on in years, and cannot stand too much stimulation.

Please.... can you guys do a proper Zoom?

Number 1: Going on screen in Zoom = Taking a photograph for your passport.

Since 2020, the passport has become something of an antique but I believe everyone has taken some kind of ID photos! Yes, the ones with your neatly combed trusses where I can see both your ears, nose, mouth, neck, shoulder all the way to your chest.

I would like to see your full face during the Bazi Consultation. Please don't allow half your face to fall off the screen and you end up looking like Zhong Wu Yan! Please also don't hide your mouth making me feel like I am talking to a Arrowana.

When I analyze your facial features, it includes your mouth, teeth and the shape of your mouth while you are talking. Yes, it is down to such level of details.

If your PC / Laptop monitor is too low, please find a book or old newspapers and stack it on top. Please don't let me only see your double chin for that 1.5 hours, as I would probably get the proportion of your face wrong.

Don't keep telling me you are apologetic. Think of a way out.

Number 2: The background lighting.

Too dark, you risk looking like a ghost.

Too bright, I cannot figure out your skin color.

Draw open the curtains, but don't face your back to the sunlight.

If necessary, just turn on the lights!

Number 3: Background images of coconut trees on sandy beaches or the Golden Gate Bridge.

There is no need to put on a virtual background. I only care about how my hone looks, I am not bothered by yours. I am only here to see your Bazi.

If your WIFI signal or your PC / Laptop performance is poor, using the virtual background can often make your Zoom video choppy. Sometimes when you turn your body, one side of your body or some part of your hair will disappear. It's really like one of those spooky movies scaring the wits out of me.

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Number 4: Background environment and noise.

Some of my overseas clients really put in effort for our Zoom sessions. They bought a headset with a mic so that I can hear them properly and vice versa.

Those that did not use a earphone or a headset often sounded echo-ish, and if they spoke softly, I would have to turn on the volume on my side full throttle and still have a hard time trying to hear them.

There are some clients from Hong Kong and Malaysia who would rent meeting rooms, hotel rooms or private work spaces by the hour so as to reduce any disturbance from others and better focus on the Zoom session with me.

I recalled an interesting incident during the Circuit Breaker last year. A client from Singapore Zoom-ed with me along the corridor outside his house. Most of the time, I was hearing the howling of the winds rather than his voice.

Some clients sat themselves in coffee places for our session. These places are often filled with loud chatters and the clanging of cups and plates, and my ears suffered terribly. Yet, I have to continue to be seen as composed and attentive.

Goodness me, after 2 of such experiences, I decided that I rather refund these clients and never see them again. I have only 1 pair of ears and I want to protect them at all costs!

A normal earpiece that comes with the purchase of a handphone is good enough for Zoom video calls. For clients who do not have a earpiece/headset and a mic, I would end the consultation and refund the monies.

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Number 5: Children

There was once where a session with a female client was repeatedly disrupted by her kids, running in crying for their mother to settle their quarrels. If you have children below 6 years of age, and likely to interrupt our session, I suggest you don't book a consultation with me.

You will be distracted, unable to focus on my advice and I have to wait for you to clear up the situation with your children, eating into the allowable time for me to complete the consultation. This is unfair to both you and me.

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Number 6: I only meet one person, that is the Client.

I have set this requirement the day I stepped into this line of work, and it is clearly written in my booking form. There is no need to try your luck under any circumstances.

But in the space of 2 weeks, there were some clients who rode their luck and got their spouse / child to sit on the other side of the screen to listen in on our consultation.

I never change my stance, and there is no single client that I cannot afford to lose.

If you insist to have your spouse sit in, it is apparent that you do not need me to help transform your destiny. Rather you really need your spouse to put your heart at ease.

If such things happen the next time, I will end the session immediately and refund the fees.

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Number 7: "My first time using Zoom"

But you have 2 full months to prepare before our actual consultation. You did not end up wasting time exploring the software and I wasted 20 mins waiting for you to download the software.

Zoom is an easy software to use but if you did not spend the time to familiarize yourself with it, please quit the lies and tell me directly. I will refund the consultation fees on the spot.

Our moral ethics serve as the foundation for our transformation. Stop weaving web of lies to get out of sticky situations, and still claim that you are a good person. Isn't this too thick-skinned?

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Number 8: Giddy spells

Some clients use Ipad or their handphones for the Zoom session. Crucially, they hold the device with one hand, and take notes with the other. As they write, the other hand holding the phone becomes shaky. If he is doing that on his bed, his handphone would shake like a tsunami wave every time he changes his position.

If I see 3 such clients within a day, it would be 5 hours of shaking visuals for me. That would mean a splitting headache at the end of my work day, and not being able to work on my videos at night.

Even if you don't have a tripod stand, at least prop up the device with a book or something.

Please everyone, please be kind and have mercy on me......

【找到你的人生合夥人】
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先說，這篇可能跟很多人的立場和想法不同，我就說說我的看法，這是我的經驗，不代表每個人都一樣。所以你當然能保留你的，不用來戰對錯，我就直接說你是對的XD。
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因為五月剛登記的關係，最近常常有朋友跟我恭喜我新婚，我也都很快樂的接受祝福，但往往有個問題我很難回答，那就是當大家問我婚前婚後的差別時，老實說我真的答不出來。
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我後來發現，除了我們會改對外的宣稱叫老公老婆外，他還是叫我張小弟，我還是叫他老闆或廢物，大概真正的區別，只有配偶欄上多了彼此的名子吧。
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而我就會好奇的問，到底婚前跟婚後有什麼差呢？當然我也有遇過結婚後岳父人忽然變超好的，還有生孩子後感覺有歸屬感的，但比起這幾件好事，幾乎都是抱怨。
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有說老婆沒事都在睡覺，很懶惰的。老公常常打電動不理他的。婆婆婚前婚後變了一個人的。因為家事分工吵架的。回娘家時間喬不攏的。孩子教育不同調的。婚後發現老婆安全感不足的等等。
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然後仔細聊了之後，我發現其中的癥結點，大概都是他們好憧憬結婚，但卻不知道自己要跟誰結婚。可能是覺得這個人對我不錯，或是感覺交往久了就要結婚，也有被家人逼婚的，或被孩子逼婚的。
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我後來發現，結婚是很多人的一個里程碑，或是婚姻通常都會跟幸福綁定，好像結了婚就能夠幸福。
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但我覺得如果你是糊里糊塗的結婚，那麼婚姻絕對不可能幸福，兩個不理解彼此的人相處，絕對是災難。
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但我一直覺得，在台灣的教育中，很少要你去思考對方與你的契合度。都在想對方工作穩不穩定阿，對方對你好不好，帥不帥美不美之類的。
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當然我覺得生存(賺錢)和生育(外貌與性吸引力)是伴侶的門檻，但更重要的是這個人如果要跟你走一輩子，那麼彼此的價值觀和想法才是決定能不能長久的關鍵啊。
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所以我一直不能理解以結婚為前提交往，我覺得應該是以理解為前提交往，結婚是在理解彼此後，經過深思熟慮的選項。但可怕的是，很多人其實都還來不及理解對方，就先跟想像中的對方結婚，就成為典型的因為不理解而結合，因為理解而分開。
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想說分享幾個我自己在結婚前想的點給大家參考，也希望給有緣人明白。
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1.理解對方的基礎價值觀，或試著找到共識
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我自己的概念有幾個，大方向就是用錢，生活與對戀愛的憧憬。如果你們對於用錢，相處，興趣愛好，食物，甚至是放假該做什麼都沒有共識的話，強烈建議不要結婚。
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舉例來說，我和女神可以一起吃大餐，但平常圖個溫飽也喜歡吃小吃攤，這就是相同的價值觀。而他喜歡出門晃晃，我很喜歡在家，但如果能找到一個咖啡廳，他出門走走，我抱著電腦或書，我們彼此都能接受，這就是共識。
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2.真心建議一起同居，不然至少要出去旅行
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我自己當時的計畫是，熬過七年之癢，八年就同居，看看彼此的生活習慣能不能相處。剛開始住的時候還真的有許多不同習慣，例如怎麼洗衣服，東西怎麼擺放，收納東西的方式，或是我愛亂丟東西等等。
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這也都是靠她不厭其煩的提醒，我努力想著怎麼樣讓彼此都過得去，才慢慢的建立起模式，所以雖然老一輩的人常覺得同居會被人家說話，但我覺得如果沒有同居過，結婚後離婚的機率真的非常之高。
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我常跟不理解的長輩說，你去買個200塊的衣服都要試穿了，但要跟你過一輩子的人沒有試過一起生活，這邏輯不是很奇怪嗎？
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3.理解對方的家人，觀看對方的態度
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我自己的偏見是，對方的家人很可能就是對方以後在家庭的模樣。所以我通常都會認真觀看對方的家人怎麼相處，或是偷偷問出發生小爭執時怎麼處理。另外就是弄結婚的時候，不是要想著一定要順利，反而是最後判斷能不能結婚的時機，而這其實是我七年和八年後的第三個計畫，就是九年弄結婚。
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弄結婚的時候，其實就能看出各種價值觀。對方家庭有沒有彈性，在乎的到底是面子還是你，而更重要的是，當真的發生爭執的時候，你未來的伴侶到底站在哪一邊。
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以我跟女神為例，我們對於對方家長提出的某些部分，如果有不好溝通的，絕對都是我搞定我家，她搞定她家。因為一家人怎麼吵都是一家人，但碰上親家很可能都會變仇人。所以有時候溝通並不是怎麼去說服對方，而是找到真正對的人。
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但如果你的伴侶在這個時候只幫他家講話，希望你各種配合，就像最近那個喜餅錢的新聞，那我真心建議這個人你要再想想...。
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我只是最近看到女神的IG，說到很多人只希望伴侶是自己想像的那樣，然後看著最近發生的新聞，還有來求助的朋友們，我真心覺得難怪很多人都說婚姻是愛情的墳墓。
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因為很多人願意花時間去弄什麼儀式，婚禮，流程，弄得有多浪漫多特別，但卻沒有花時間去理解你的伴侶，價值觀，生活習慣，家人。
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所以我一直很白眼很多人說什麼會離婚是因為當時什麼習俗沒弄好，八字沒合對，時辰沒選好。那根本都不是問題，問題就在於大家都把婚姻當賭博，看自己有沒有賭對。
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可惜十賭九輸，當不懂還下注，卻弄得全盤皆輸，只告訴別人墳墓了....。畢竟他們根本搞錯重點，幸福一直都是因為遇到了對的合夥人，而不是因為結婚啊
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喔對了，如果還沒有女神IG的，歡迎追蹤追起來：
https://www.instagram.com/p/CCI_CInpE9X/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
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#忘形流簡報
#結婚不是搞排場或浪漫
#而是找到適合的合夥人
#幸福也不是儀式跟婚禮
#而是兩個人的相處方式

【改命要趁早，知命要更早】(English writing below)

我最年輕的客人才兩歲。

不過，當天她沒出席我批八字的現場。來的是她爸爸，而他就用了她的生日紅包錢來付我。所以說嘛，誰說小孩子就一定沒有錢？😄

客人當中，約20%是25歲以下的青年，而大多數都是男生。他們來找我的共同原因，都是為了瞭解事業發展的方向。當我問他們為何芸芸風水命理師當中，他們會選擇找我，一致的答案都是因為他們贊同我文章中的邏輯思維，也明白用八字的智慧打贏這場人生大戰，遠勝過用兵器。

Ziegler就是其中一位。他因為某位朋友分享我的文章，而認識我，但他已不記得哪位友人是誰。在這裡，我先向那位男生說聲「謝謝」，因為你這無心的舉動，幫了一位年青人找到一條明路。善也！

去年Ziegler本來找我看風水，當時檔期滿，我回拒了他。但他並沒有因此就打退堂鼓，還問我如何能見到我。今年六月，我們終於見面了。

收他紅包時，我問他裡頭的錢是他自己的，還是他父母給他的？他說是他自己做生意存來的，他老早已不向父母拿零用錢。有志氣！自己的命，自己賺錢來看。我欣賞這樣的作風。

坦白說，有時我也蠻喜歡為年青人批八字。他們有種勇猛和幹勁，是有些年過三十的男士比較缺乏的。唯一擔心的，是有些年青人太過於愛錢好權，道德核心價值顛倒得嚴重。

年紀較大的客人，因為經歷好些滄桑，又多了家庭的負擔，做任何事情時，有時會顯得優柔寡斷、固執己見。人越老，越會傲慢，不願意改善自己思維上的缺陷，往往會覺得都是他人的錯，大環境的不公平。

但這年齡層的客人，就是因為吃了苦頭才來找我，所以有一些也會比較聽話，很快的就去進行我的建議。

有些男士過於聽取自己內人的意見，而讓她控制了他的意願。同樣的，也有些女士被老公影響，而荒廢了一生青春。

他們忘了改命改運的專家是我，而不是他們的配偶。這是他們之間的業障，互相拖累，我也沒有什麼好惋惜的。

有趣的是，我25歲以下的男客人，就根本不會被女朋友的看法左右。我想，還沒結婚生子的，真的是業障比較輕呀！要珍惜啊～～～

我看八字可以講的很細，你來找我的時候，記得帶心來，我們來認真的分析妳你的未來，面子那種不值錢的東西就留在家吧！

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My youngest client was 2 years old.

But she didn't come for her Bazi consultation. Her father came instead and paid for the Bazi consultation with her birthday angpow money. Who says kids nowadays are poor? 😄

Among my clients, about 20% of them are aged 25 and below and almost all are guys. Career prospects and direction is the key reason they come seeking my advice. When I asked why they chose me over others, their answers would always be they agree with the logic in my writing and can understand that to win the battles in life, using Bazi wisdom is always more powerful than using weapons.

Ziegler is one of them. He knew of me from my post that a friend shared on his Facebook. But Ziegler could not remember who that friend was. Regardless of that, I wish to say thank you to that young man, for his innocent gesture of sharing had helped a young man to find his way in life. Virtuous indeed!

Ziegler first contacted me for a Feng Shui audit last year, but my schedule was full and I turned him away. But he did not beat a retreat, but instead probed how he could meet me. In this year June, we finally met for a consultation.

When I received his angpow, I asked if the monies inside came from him or his parents. He told me it was money he saved from doing business, and that he had long stopped taking pocket money from his parents. To make our own money to understand our own destiny - this is a great aspiration that I admire.

Frankly speaking, sometimes I do like analysing Bazi for this younger age group. They have a kind of courage and enthusiasm that some men over 30 years old lack. The only worrying thing is some of these young men are overly obsessive with money and power that their core moral values are totally upside down.

My clients who are older tend to have gone through more trials of Life. With the family burden on their shoulders, in anything they do, they can sometimes be overly indecisive and stubborn. As a person ages, he/she can get more arrogant, and be unwilling to mend the loopholes in his/her mindset. They are more likely to blame others and circumstances for the injustice they face in their lives.

Then again, there are also some clients in this age group who have suffered many hardships, and hence sought my advice. These clients are often more obedient and would implement my recommendations at the speed of lightning.

Some men allow their wives to control their lives. At the same times, there are also ladies who are greatly influenced by their husbands and wasted their precious youths. They end up missing the boat to change their destinies for their better.

They forget that the specialist in destiny transformation is me, and not their spouses. But I get it. This is their karmic hindrance, dragging both the husband and wife down.

Interestingly, in my male clients below 25 years old, they are very unlikely to be affected by their girlfriends' opinions to seek a Chinese Metaphysics practitioner's advice. I guess, it's true, isn't it? Those who have yet to marry and bear children are suffering from less negative karma. Cherish the freedom, my friends ~~~

I am very detailed in my Bazi analysis, as you can read from Ziegler's feedback. So when you come for your appointment, remember to bring your heart so that we can have a serious discussion about your future, and since your pride isn't going to add value to our session, just leave it at home!