二階建てのトラックにぎゅうぎゅうに詰め込まれた豚さん達。小さな小窓に近づき水を飲むことが出来るのはほんの数頭だけでした。 ⁡ ほんの2分ほどの間、トラックは停止してくれていましたが、間も無くして屠畜場の中へと入っていきました。あの豚さん達が、そのまますぐ解体されてしまったのか、数日間生き延びれたのかは分かりません。 ⁡ 一匹さえも救うことが出来ないなか、殺される前に水をやるこの行為の意味は、一体なんなんだろうかと、頭がこんがらがりました。遅かれ早かれ殺されてしまう命を前にたった数匹に水を与え、慈悲を感じることが自己満足な行為にさえ感じました。 ⁡ 豚さん達にとって最後の水分補給がどれほど意味があったのかは計り知れませんが、今は動物の権利を発信する者として自分の目でこの命を見送ることは、とても大切だったと感じています。ぎゅう詰めのトラックに１０時間も揺られそのまま屠殺されるその様子は、命を扱っているとは到底思えないものでした。 ⁡ この屠畜場では１日に７千から１万頭の豚さんが屠殺されるそうです。人々の肉への要求がどれだけ高いのかを思い知らされます。 ⁡ 私も長年お肉を食べてきました。味も楽しんだし、家族や友達と楽しく食卓を囲んだり、旅行先で食べた料理など、思い出すと懐かしく感じることもたまにあります。ただその命がどうやって飼育され、屠殺されるのかを知った以上、それらの感情は意味を持たなくなるのです。 ⁡ 私たちが愛する人との楽しい食事や、思い出を語り喜びを感じることがとても大切なように、この命達も同様に、喜びや自由を感じられるべきだと思うからです。 ⁡ 希望を失ったあの豚さん達の悲しそうな目を、私は一生忘れないと思います。 ⁡ I've been to pig vigil to give them water before they were sent to the slaughterhouse. ⁡ There were so many pigs squeezed into two leveled tracks. Many of them could not reach the windows, so we could only give water to the few pigs who were lucky to be close by. They were very thirsty. ⁡ After a minute or so, the track went inside the facility and we had no idea how soon they would be slaughtered. ⁡ So what is the meaning of doing this? I wasn't sure. I even felt a bit egoistic that we wanted to feel sympathy through giving water to a few of them, when there are so many more we couldn't reach, much less save. Either way, they would meet their fate soon or later. I felt so useless. ⁡ But it was important for me to witness in my own eyes what these pigs would go through, how sad they seemed, how inhumanely they were bunched up and transferred for about 10 hours of a drive. ⁡ The organizer of @LAANIMALSAVE told us that they slaughter 7 to 10 thousand pigs every day in that facility. That shows how much we consume them on a daily basis. ⁡ I used to eat meat just like most of us. I did enjoy the taste, creativity and artistic point of food, as well as the joy of gathering with friends and family. There is nostalgia attached to it all. But for me, none of those things matter when I know they meant a big sacrifice of lives. As much as we humans deserve good lives and basic rights, so do they. #pigvigil #animalrights

418. November 2020 is a really weird month. I feel like I’m going through major changes within daily. Emotions fluctuate. A month where I realize when anger, frustration, impatience, fear of abandonment, codependency and ego self arises when I’m in awareness it’s the sign of releasing the old wounds. Healing. Stepping into my power and gain clarity of who i really am, my true identity. Feeling like I’m guided to this piece of information to know where I’m at in my journey to manifest the love I crave for the rest of my life. It’s no ordinary relationship. I’ve always craved it since childhood. I feel no one around me understands the level of connection that I crave to have. The love I want has no room for ego and fear. The connection is so intense that if I don’t fully step into unconditional love it will only provoke pain and disease. My soul choose this gameplay in this 3D world to experience the fruitfulness egoless love. And I’m not the type of player to give up. I’m the type of player who intentionally chooses the game like bloodborne, Nioh and pushes through even I want to smash the console and cry lol (now I know why hahaha) Today I was feeling angry towards my experience of being emotionally abused and not being aware of it. Shockingly, the toxicity came from people that’s closest to me. (All male.) Male figures trying to tell me what to do, trying to manipulate and pin me into a box of my past. Trying to put fear in me, trying to take away my light. And I feel so angry that no male figures has committed to love and support me in my entire life. They are all egoistic and never truly there for me. On deep level I’m always viewed as a competition for them. (Maybe because I “know” far too much) But I know that’s something I experienced to learn and grow. It’s has shown me my conditioning and what I have to release in order to embody the love I want to become and receive. I trust the universe for this journey and I feel god with me every step of the way since November. Thank you. #awakening #spirituality #raiseyourfrequency #purging #journey #unconditionallove #connection #cominghome #healing #starseed #divinebeing #devinetiming #hardcoreplayer

good vibes only. this too shall pass. stay positive, it could be worse. — i wanted to write about this for the longest time but just couldn’t articulate it better than my friend @erikahilaryoga While yoga, meditation, ahimsa, loving-kindness is something I practice, every single day when I step in to teach; I worry about the effects of my teachings to the classroom. How will my class affect student’s feelings. How will this effect their mental health. Will I bring change, or more harm. 

Of late I see more and more meditation teachers blooming out of their x hour online meditation course. And; some are not even qualified to teach meditation. Don’t even get me started about teaching yoga. While I truly support and encourage people who long and want to be teachers, I also worry about what they are ultimately teaching. 
while I teach a more yang practice; I am extremely mindful to not breed egoistic students. when I guide meditation; I am extremely mindful not to talk too much about how just breathing can solve the problems you may have. While I do own a studio now, I am also extremely worried about what the students may feel as they walk out of class. This to me; is a responsibility and burden, far greater than just being a teacher. 

what worries me the most at this point right now; is all the constant brainwashing of teachers (and sometimes just business and social media content creators) that loving kindness and positivity and all the good vibes will “heal” you. That a one hour sound bath is all you need to make your day better. And all you need is yin-side. let’s be real. Your problem is still there. Are you acknowledging it, or avoiding it?

to me; the yoga (social media especially and the widespread 20 mins meditation to feel good or relief abcde) industry have come to a point where it is breeding toxic positivity that oversimplifies the human brain and how we process emotions. When you deny or avoid unpleasant emotions, you make them bigger. you don’t know what you don’t know. so when you share something that potentially bring more harm than good- you are responsible for it. think about it.